untitle 2

I'm stress, I'm not having exams, I've no assignment due, I'm not in a relationship, I've no family or friendship problems, yet I'm stress. I'm stress for no reason.

I don't know if I'm the lucky one who get to climb all the way till this second year of university life in UK. Or is it I really "that smart" for others? Sisters took me as a role model, I'm not proud of it. Granny told the whole village that I'm studying in UK, I'm not proud of it. Everyone can do it, everyone can study in UK. I'm not the special one.

I don't know what am I good in. I'm not smart in studying, I have no music talent, I'm not socialable, I'm not good in writing, I'm not good in drawing, I've no sense of humour,I'm not creative, I'm not sporting, I couldn't sing, I couldn't dance, I couldn't make any speech, I dont have good memory, I'm not good in computer, I'm not good in cheering people, I've no skills... I choose to study psychology simply because I don't know what to study and since psychology can go into any field of industries.

I'm so lost !!! I'm trying to find my way back, finding the true self.

I feel stress when people praise me, whenever people tell that i'm great, i'm important to them, they are proud of me. Because i'm not, they don't know me. The more they feel proud of me, they more i feel guilty for myself. They thought they know me,they thought they understand me, but they so don't know me.......as I don't even know who am I.